Another one bites the dust...

Yup, that is right.. We killed another toy already.. Andrew has also lost his inflatable chair to the great unknown... Personally I would not have bought these monsters ANYTHING inflatable.. BUT Ben wanted his brother and sister to have them and Daddy could not say no....

The holiday behind us.....

Can I tear down the tree yet? This past week has been chaos... Sunday we had my husbands family party at our house. During the afternoon I noticed Ben was getting crankier and more miserable then ever. I decided to see if he had a temp and he did. This is important because I only get a temperature when I am SERIOUSLY ill. The kids have taken after me in that respect. So a temp is HUGE- he was pushing 102. I medicated him well that night and planned on calling the Dr first thing in the morning. Poor Ben woke up Monday morning miserable. I gave him water and he fell back to sleep. Slept in until 11am! So I had made the appt for him when I noticed Andrew had this HUGE raw looking spot on his tongue.. No explanation for it, no injury.. it looked like a good chunk of his tongue was torn off. I called back and they added him to the list.
~~but wait.. it gets better~~
If you recall it was FREEZING that day.. single digits. I took the van to get gas and came back. When I was ready to go warm the van to take the boys to the Dr the Battery was dead. We knew this was coming but THIS was not a good day for it. SO I had to rip 2 car seats out and put them in Michael's car, yell at the boys to get ready and GO! Of course we got stuck behind an accident and were slightly late.
Got to sit and explain all the latest medical woes to the Nurse Practitioner who we were seeing. Andrew kept coughing while we were talking. So she checked him first. Looked at his tongue, felt his throat, checked his ears.. YES.. he has two ear infections.. How did this happen???

So then she gets to Ben.. Two more ear infections.. So that is 40 in copays, 18 in antibiotics and another 18 and change for probiotics so I can try to counter all the meds they are on....

Spent Monday and Tuesday cuddling and comforting sick little boys. Weds found me fighting something in my intestines which led into the cold that I am finally getting over. Now today Madeline is starting to sneeze, snot and cough..
Will it ever end? Will the junk go away?

So the important information is that Christmas was nice, way too much stuff and the kids will not keep things picked up. Ben is thrilled to have Rock Band drums to play on and I can already see that he has picked up rhythm.. Now if I could figure out how to get him pitch...
We lost two presents already.. on Christmas day in fact. The super nerf blaster thing... well that great pump action power broke instantly. Plus the inflatable princess chair blew out a seam right away. Nice...

So that is the life in my house.. Sickness and broken toys.. Happy New year!

Cough, Cough, Wheeze, Snort... repeat...

Can anyone STAY healthy? My goodness this is getting annoying. Ben did a round of antibiotics for a single ear infection in November. Took maybe 8-10 days and he was complaining again.. This time we hit the Pediatrician (last time was urgent care) and she found double ear infections and the same upper respiratory crap that everyone else has that is VIRAL! So 5 more days of meds and he was fine. Thursday he comes home from school super cranky.. I assumed he got a purple day but he said no.. stayed green.
After a while of Mr. Crabby pants I felt his head.. WARM! His temp was around 100 so I popped him some Tylenol and juice.. He was fine. Went to school on Friday and seemed fine. So yesterday he is congested again.. Coughy, snotty, nose getting red from being rubbed.. SICK again.
Michael went to bed complaining that he comes home healthy from a trip and now feels his throat itching.. .I swear half of his problems are allergies BUT what are you going to do..
Andrew is rubbing up against me coughy and snotty... YEAH ME!

PLEASE can they all stay healthy? My neighbor said that 1st grade sucked for them too.. She stayed home and did not do preschool either. Also half day K. So when full day 1st grade came it beat the crap out of her daughter too. This year 2nd grade she is MUCH healthier.. GOSH I hope that is the truth... Which also REALLY adds to my desire to put them in 3-4 day preschool next year.. BUILD, build build those immunities...

Off to the store soon for Michael's prescriptions, more sinus meds and maybe tissues??

Portraits

~BUSINESS PLUG~

I wanted to get a nice photo of all the kids for holiday gifts. I Usually go to Picture People and have to travel to Chapel Hill Mall and battle the mall crowd. I decided I would rather shove splinters under my nails then deal with that on a Saturday in December. I called Portrait Innovations in Green and made an appointment there. I figured I would get at minimum the the $10 package and hopefully at least 1 kid would be cooperative.

AMAZING!

I believe this was the absolute BEST photo session I have ever experience. They have a photographer and a handler to the shots. I sat in a chair from the waiting room and they did the work. All I did was pick out the pictures! I usually am sweating by the end of a picture shoot b/c I am running around keeping kids in the frame, on the spot, not fighting, smiling and not pouting.

I will definitely be back. We need a new family portrait and the twins have a birthday coming up in March. I plan to keep them in business and send others there also!

Morning Breath

The twins have horrible morning breath. It is truly foul. They are also very snugly in the morning and want to curl up on our laps and rock. Michael has taken to joking with the kids about eating stinkbugs in the night.

This morning the two slept in later then their usual ( Hallelujah!). Ben was almost out the door when Maddie walked in the room, Andrew followed minutes later. Andrew climbed on my lap and was in my face telling me how he made his bed. I recoiled at the smell and gave him a hug and told him he must have eaten a LOT of stinkbugs last night. He looked at me and asked if I ate stink bugs at night. I said NO mama never eats stinkbugs. He leaned over and gave me a huge kiss on the lips and proclaimed "THERE! now you have stink bugs too!"

Out of the mouths of babes...

On Saturday I had a friend and her kids over for the day. I had to leave around 645pm to take Ben to a late bday party. Since she had an hour drive ahead of her she planned on putting the kids in their pajamas and then bathing them in the morning before church. I told her to just bathe them here.. Why wait till the morning.. So the baby sat by the kitchen watching me load the dishwasher while my friend got the tub ready and washed her 5y/o daughter and Maddie. When they were done I gathered the baby, lotion and all the clothing and started to get the girls all greased and dressed while my friend refilled the tub and bathed her 3 y/o son and Andrew. This worked out great b/c my two would be ready for bed after we returned from being out and her evening was done except for the drive.

While I was getting shoes and socks on everyone my friends daughter looks at my feet and then ran a finger on my heel.. She looked at me and said " I tell my mom this and I will tell you.. YOU need to Ped-Egg!"

I laughed so hard. I offered to get her mine and put her to work on my feet. She looked at me like I was crazy and told me " OH NO! That is too dangerous for a kid!"

Saturday Morning Fun!

You know things are looking barren when you realize that you have enough time to empty and clean out the refrigerator while the french toast sticks are cooking in the toaster oven! AND you actually do it!

I'll admit it. I am weird in the fact that I like seeing things get *Mother Hubbard* like. I like seeing that I am using it all and things are not going to waste. I hate finding 2 month old yogurt cups back on the bottom shelf or shriveled petrified carrots and celery in the crisper drawer...

I picked up the Market Day order in Tuesday and that brought in a package of personal pizzas, gingerbread cookies to bake, popcorn chicken, shrimp(for Christmas), some chicken breasts and previously mentioned french toast sticks. So my freezer is looking fine.

Today I am picking up an order from Angel Food Ministries, http://www.angelfoodministries.com/, for the first time. When I first heard about it there was never a site local to me. Our church participates so I thought I would give it a try. I bought 1 regular box and a fruit/veggie box.. The kids will be thrilled with fresh fruit. I just opened my last can of mandarin oranges for breakfast.

So after I pick up my order and put that away I can make a list and see what I still need.. I know bread and orange juice top that list... Maybe the twins and I will hit Marcs tonight while Ben is at his Pump it Up Bday party!

~*~ See what fun you are missing Michael.. While you are *stuck* at the Colorado Country (country club) Christmas party.... I will be scavenging the junk aisles at Marcs.. WITHOUT YOU!~*~

Inquiring minds want to know.....

WILLMAR, Minn. - A 50-year-old man who told authorities he was fed up with teens toilet-papering his house decided to defend his property — with a squirt gun filled with fox urine.
Now, Scott Wagar is in trouble with the law.
Wagar pleaded not guilty on Wednesday in Kandiyohi County District Court to misdemeanor assault and other charges. He was released on personal recognizance.
According to police, Wagar was on his property Sept. 16 when he used night vision goggles to see 15-20 people running toward his place. He told police that he told them to leave, swore at them and sprayed them with the fox urine. He also allegedly struggled with one of the teens.
A phone message left at a home listing for a Scott Wagar was not immediately returned to The Associated Press.
URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28191199/?GT1=43001


So my question is...

Where did this guy get the Fox Urine???????

Wrapping packages...

The kids are *helping* me wrap for the adopt a family, cousins, daddy.. that kind of stuff.. Maddie and Andrew found some leftover scraps of paper. So they have VERY nicely folded and wrapped and taped and found scissors and cut ribbon.. Brought it to me and had me tie a knot in the ribbon...

I just realized they forgot to put anything IN the wrapping paper...LOL! But they are folding very nicely!

We can plant an apple tree..

Maddie comes up to me, out of nowhere, and says excitedly,

" We can get a pile of dirt, poke a hole in it, put the seeds in and pour water on and it will grow into an apple tree!"

I laugh and say "You want to plant an apple tree?"

She nods emphatically and says "Oh yes! I have the seeds in my pocket!" and she sticks her fingers in and brings out a few little apple seeds.

Apparently she took Bens apple core out of the trash and tore it open for the seeds...

Is she trying to tell me something?

The other morning Madeline came out all messied haired from her bedroom and climbed up on my lap for a cuddle. She looks up at me and says ( with her nasty morning breath), " I slept in my bed all night.. But I need to go practice my jump rope.. I just cannot do it all myself"

I was like WHAT? where did that come from?

So then last night I was talking to my friend Robyn when Maddie stops by me and proclaims " I need to go practice ice skating mama"

WHAT???? Robyn was like " did she just tell you she needs to practice ice skating?" I laughed and said.. that is what she said..

SO now she just tells me I need to get her into diving practice.. b/c she is still holding her nose shut. This kid is cracking me up.
The only thing they have ever used a jump rope for is a whip or a lasso, she has never seen an ice rink besides on the television and the closest she has been to a diving board was at my friend Debs house back in August.

Crazy girl.. I think she watched too much tv!

It only took 2 days....

I pulled out the tree and a pile of ornaments and the kids had a blast decorating Saturday evening. You can see the musical holidays *decorations*. The Grinch, grandma who got ran over by a reindeer, the singing snowman and the musical bears... None had even been batteried up yet. I put them ALL away yesterday. I have no idea how many times I had to tell the kids to put the ornaments BACK on the tree, stop swinging the Grinch by his hat, Stop hitting each other with the snowman pillow. All chose to ignore me( Ben was home with bi-lateral ear infections) so when I saw that someone ripped the tasseling off the decorative pillow I grabbed an empty tote and piled it all back in and put it away. I threatened them with removing the entire tree. I *think* they believe me or at least fear I might follow through with this one... So for now.. things are a little more peaceful.

Doesn't it just figure...

Michael is getting ready to leave (for way too many days) tomorrow and his ear is killing him. He was put on antibiotics on Friday for the sinus mess.. so is it an infection or just water from the shower? THEN I have Ben.. The sinusy stuff is apparently coming back.. Sounding congested again. Yesterday he complained about his ear for a while. I gave him some Motrin and a decongestant. He stopped complaining. NOW after church he is fussing that his throat is hurting him some.. I see some red in his throat but then, I am not a Dr.

I envision that my week will be starting with dropping Michael at the airport and driving to the Pediatricians.... yeah.

Well, I learned at 5:00am....

That the child who has no issue with wearing his sisters fluffy pink ballerina costumes all day long DOES have an issue with waking up to find out he was dressed in pink footed jammies for bed!

Andrew fell asleep on the way home from Target last night and despite my best efforts, refused to wake up. SO I stripped him and went to gather jammies. Maddie found her Princess jammies and dressed herself. I only had 1 clean set left in the closet. Being that I was too lazy to walk down to the dryer I grabbed those and proceeded to dress Andrew in the adorable light pink jammies with dark pink dots. He never woke enough to process the whole event so I rocked him a few minutes and laid him in bed.

Fast Forward...

Around 5am- after a few hours of tossing and turning sleep I was finally in a good dozy state- I feel a cold nose on my face and I pop open my eyes as I JUMP up in my bed. I grab Andrews hand and head to the bathroom as this is usually the issue. Not this time. Andrew stands in the hall and starts to cry LOUDLY. "Why I wearing girl jammies? I NOT wear girl jammies" WAHHHH. I grab him and drag him OUT of the hall so Ben nor Maddie get the desire to get up that early. I hug him and rock him and just tell him nothing was clean. I also told him it was his fault b/c he was asleep when I put him in them. Who cares if it is blaming the victim! I rocked him a few more minutes and tucked him in bed. When he woke later around 730am he again realized his predicament and went to work correcting it immediately. Since the closet was unlocked he got into the drawers and came out dressed in a air of BOY underwear, jeans and a pirate t-shirt.. A VERY masculine outfit for a 3 year old.

He's a hard working man.

Andrew was hard at work in his room this afternoon. He was using his Melissa and Doug wooden tools to build with. I took a peek on my was past and smiled at how busy he looked. I was laying on my bed reading when Michael came in stifling a laugh. He caught Andrew in the middle of *working*. He was watching him build when all of the sudden Andrew picks up his cell phone( one of our old Verizon phones he carries with him all the time) and goes " Hello? What do you want.. I am busy building Hedicoptors. Okay Bye"

Took cute! Michael said he was so serious he had to laugh. That boy can make us laugh some days!

I am Thankful for my Pediatrician and her great staff!

I loved my old pediatrician but when Michael got his new job in March 07 our current office took every insuarance.. BUT our new one... GRRR! I had been very happy there with the staff and our primary Ped. Having to change against our wishes really bummed me out. With my background in CPS I have an intimate knowledge of the local Medical staff.. Whom I might be willing to go to and those whom I would not trust a stuffed animal too. I knew getting into one I wanted would be hard. But I had no problem whining and begging and using my life lines.... I am really pleased with Dr Kungle and Childrens Physicians. If I want my child seen it will happen. If I call with a question I get an answer.. No hemming and hawing.. No " WOW the Dr really needs to see your child".. cannot answer that on the phone kind of answers.

I will admit it. I am cheap. But on the other hand I am very intelligent and down to earth. WHY should I spend $20 per child to be told to buy an OTC medication for a cough. I can diagnose that myself. Recently I called in b/c i was wondering if this Upper Respiratory Junk was going on too long. I caved and called in. It was going on 3 weeks and Andrew was sounding like a little smoker. She said if I did not hear from the Dr then call my pharmacy after 12pm.. Within the hour the Dr called. Asked what was going on with the kids. What they were doing. I told her about the clear snot, the colored snot, the smokers laugh, bouncing Andrew on my knees and using his back ans my drum set, the elevated mattresses and humdifier. Instead of the " Bring them in" I was bracing myself for her response was " Sounds like your doing all you can.. this is the season.. Use Delsym if the cough is really causing him distress and of course call back if you get symptoms like ear infction of sore throat!" YEAH! Confirmation that I was on the right track and it was FREE!

Which brings me to today..... Yesterday afternoon Andrew fell asleep on my and when he woke he had huge gunk in his eyes.. I thought nothing of it.. Then later they start looking blood shot and gunky.. yeah... This morning his eye is more bloodshot and although I don't see gunk( he might have wiped it out himself) is is dull and off looking. I call the office hoping to get in since the copay for an office visit is $15.oo less then urgent care. I talk to a wonder nurse who patiently listens to my symptom list while I am chasing Andrew and the booger he is trying to blow on me. Her response to me. "Oh yuck that is no good.. Lets call you in a prescription.." and proceeds to get my info.. WHAT? No visit that I have to race through Belden traffic to get to? no picking up germs from sick waiting room kids? No getting there to see the eye looking 75% better? NOTHING but the meds.

I know if I sounded unsure of what was going on I could get in. If the symptoms were more pressing I would be seen and necessary attn received.. BUT I called in with questions and descriptions related to conjunctivitis/Pink eye and I will get... a medication!

I am so grateful for that! Now I guess I should go check on the coughing child huh?

Bumper sticker

I saw this bumper sticker on a car today and it just cracked me up! Obviously I find humor in the little things.

Chat Chat Chat Chat

Where are we going mama? Why mama? What are we going to do? Why is the ground white? Is it because it is snowing? Why is it snowing mama? Can I wear these shorts? Why not? Is it because it is cold? Can I watch tv? I want kid shows? Not that one. Not that one. Not that one.. YESYESYESYEY. MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAM.. I pooped.. Wipe my butt.. not too hard. Mama.. I want a juice. not that kind. Yes that kind. Do cats have eyes? Do dogs have eyes? Do trees have eyes? Why not? To potatoes have eyes? They do? Where? How? Does leaves have eyes? Why is Ben going to the Dr? Is it b/c he is sick? Can I go? I want some of his medicine. I am sick too. (cough, cough) Can I have a vitamen then? I want to play with that. I want to see it. You have better listen or santa will not bring you any toys andwew..........
Wemember.. God is watching you...

** A brief overview of what I hear in any random 60 minute time frame if my day coming out Maddies mouth**

How daddy maintains control of the kids in the afternoons

A few weeks back I was busy folding and putting laundry away and left the kids in the living room where Michael was studying for some computer exam. The kids were being really calm and I did not hear him yelling at them so I continued to work and get things done. When I finally came out this is what I found. Crayola Washable markers are great for tattooing and pedicuring.

Monday in Ohio...esp. for thos who are not here..

The snow is flying. It looks much more dramatic through the window. I promise. Kids are amazed at the corn field next to us having snow on the stalks still standing.. Not sure WHY that is so fascinating but it works for them!

Not Me!

Not me! Not me! That is all I hear these days.. at least when they are not blaming someone else for their faults. The latest was just this morning. I went to clean up the bathroom. I know 'nuff said! So I go in and grab a bag to dump the trash. Clean off the bathroom counter putting away toothpaste, brushes and combs. I go to open the window to get fresh air in there and I feel the wetness seep into my sock... EWWWWWWWWW! The grout in front of the toilet is discolored and wet. Nice. I look around and yes.. the entire side of the toilet is nasty.. I think we need to plan a toilet training seminar this weekend. So I pick up the trash can and the toilet brush and move them. I turn to put the stool into the tub to get it out of my way... and what do I see? YELLOW all over the inside of the tub.. I storm into the living room and ask Andrew if he peed in the tub.. He looks at me.. quiet and guilty like.. and says.. NOT ME. ARG!!!!!!

So the bathroom has had a total scrub down. It no longer has a urinal smell.... What am I going to do with these boys???

Funny things they say...

Saturday Andrew ran across the street and asked our neighbor Maria if she wanted mushrooms. She looked at him funny so he questioned her.. "Don't you want to come burn mushrooms with me?" I laughed and clarified he meant to toast marshmallows!

Just now driving home from the gym Maddie was looking into the sky and said.."OH! I see the plump.. I see plump." I looked where she was looking and had no idea what she was saying.. I also looked for a pump of some sort.. Then I saw it. The Gooodyear Blimp! She saw it again and was so excited to see the PLUMP following us home...

I guess this is what is meant by "Knock Em Dead"

WZZM 13 News - Print Editon

RAVENNA, Mich. (WZZM) - Teammates in his bowling league think after rolling a perfect 300 game Don Doane's heart just gave out. "You get nervous shooting a 300," says teammate Todd Place. "The pressure keeps building," says bowling alley owner Jim Nutt.
Minutes after achieving the life long goal of a perfect game the 62 year old bowler collapsed and died at Ravenna Bowl in Ravenna. "Don just collapsed," says alley owner Nutt. " At first we thought he just fainted." "Then when I rolled him over I realized it wasn't good," says teammate Place.
The teammates say he was giving a high-five minutes before. They tried to revive him but Doane never spoke another word. He died of what was apparently a massive heart attack "He looked fine, reached across the table and gave me a high-five and he fell over," says Place.
"I think he died by the time he hit the floor." Don Doane was a member of the "Nutt Farm" bowling team at Ravenna Bowl for 45 years. His teammates says its strange not to see him on league nights.
"It was like a book, a final chapter," says Place. "He threw his 300 game with all of his friends, gave each other high-fives and it's like the story ended. He died with a smile on his face."
"Don will be a legend," says Nutt. 'It's something that will never be forgotten as long as people bowl here." Ravenna Bowl is planning a memorial ceremony for Doan's' wife Linda and son Chad.
Phil Dawson


When I was teenager a friend was saying how her grandfather was talking about dying after a few people he had known had recently died of illness. He stated that if it were up to him he would chose to die on the golf course.. and he wanted to fuss so just a pine box for his burial.
Don't you know a few short weeks later after finishing a 18 hole round of golf my friend grandfather sat down on a bench for a minute and keeled over dead. Instantly. Went the way he wanted. Simple and peaceful.. They finished his dream by having a simple pine box built and a big old post funeral dinner....

Hurry and grab the gloves!

There is snow on my porch! The kids are thrilled. Trying to explain to them that it will not last is pointless. It is really not noticeable from the frotn window because it is not sticking to the grass so you only get the ground effect from the porch view!

YEAH for my first photo attempt!

Dinnertime bribery works!

I made a dinner that I knew woudl not go over well: Turkey Mignon, twice baked potatos and chinese broccoli. I gave each child a small portion as well as a serving of applesauce. Ben immediatly starts to whine. Andrew tosses all the broccoli in his mouth without thought. Maddie starts in on her applesauce. I sat with them ( waiting to eat with Michael who was on a call in the office) and encourgaed them to try it all. I provided ketchup for those who have sauce issues. Ben was just being bratty and refused to try anything.. I KNOW if he just stops whining he will eat the turkey, applesauce and potatoes. He flat out refuses.

So I bring out the big guns.

I tell them all that whoever eats their dinner will get an ice cream sundae. (I just grabbed the leftover ice cream from my moms freezer today.) Maddie becomes a freaking mad woman. My non meat eater devours all her turkey and then eats the inside of the potato. I was in AWE! She was leary of the broccoli after she sampled the seasoning. I gave her credit.. ususally she eats an entire head of broccoli herself. So with Ben off in his own pout land and Andrew watching to see if I will give in we go make a sundae. I put vanilla ice cream, chocolate syrup, sprinkles and whipped cream together.. along with their favorite a *magic* cherry. She proudly takes it to the table and starts eating it like there is no tomorrow.. bragging the whole time.

Look what I got!

Mine is the biggest ice cweam ever.

Lookey what I got.. YUMMY

All of the sudden she stand up and starts to moan.. it gets louder and louder and she flings herself across my lap..
RUB MY HEAD, rub my head mama.. it hurts mama.. my face hurts...

I was laughing so hard. My little girl has her first ice cream headache. All that showing off brought her pain and agony. I rub her for a moment and she jumps right back into her seat and cleans her bowl.

Andrew not to be outdone eats his turkey and takes 2 bites of his potato. He then goes to the kitchen to await my arrival so he could oversee the sundae building event. He was much more civilized in his eating and avoided the headache.

Dishes have been done and sadly.. Ben received no ice cream. stubbornness got the best of him again...

There is always one non believer.

Due to the nasty coughing coming from the twins room Michael and I felt it was necessary to pull out the vaporizer. So I dug into the depths of the linen closet and pulled out the machine. After a thorough scrubbing and rinsing I filled it and carried off to the bedroom. They desperately needs a nap. I plugged it in and immediately gave the lecture about NOT touching this. I told how it will help their cough, it will make them feel better and how very hot it is. I warned them over and over to NOT touch the machine, the plug or the steam. Michael then comes in and goes over it.

Wouldn't you know.. Madeline had to check it out herself. Now she has a slight steam burn on her palm/thumb.. Go figure.. that thing is HOT!

Language and threats

I love this stage where they are learning new words all the time but pronunciation and usage is not perfect. If you ask Andrew where he lives he will say "Canton, Ho-Hi-Ho" He likes to talk about how daddy spent the week at work in "cowumbus"

Our regular attendance at First Christian Church, http://www.firstchristian.info/
is providing lots of new songs and stories from all the kids. Ben had me in tears a few weeks ago. They talked about the story of Steven and how he was stoned. To really send the story home they held a fake "stoning" They all crumpled up green paper and *STONED* one of the Childrens Ministry leaders b/c it was his birthday! I only hope that the next class birthday at school doesn't lead him to ball up his homework and start his own stoning...

Recently overheard while the children were playing.

Maddie- Stop it Andwew- that is mine
Andrew- No, I play wif it...
Maddie- Stop it Andwew, God is watching you.. God can see you.. He gonna be mad atch you!


Today is an inservice day so Ben is home. SO we are sitting at the table eating breakfast together and Ben does something.. I cannot even remember what it was(Isn't that sad?). I rolled me eyes at him and told him to just stop it. Mother Maddie had to interject and question her big brother with " Stop it Ben! Is that reawy Necessary?" I almost chocked on my cheerios!

M&M's- They do melt in the nose....

I am in the kitchen this afternoon doing dishes and talking to a friend on the phone. Maddie and Andrew keep trying to *help* me so I send them on their way with cups of juice and 1 small fun size bag of M&M's to split. Shortly after this Andrew comes back to the kitchen whining..nothing unusual about that. I finally understand that he keeps repeating " It hurts.. my noses hurts" I tell Kelly "I think he stuck a piece of candy in his nose..gotta go." and hung up the phone.

I so wish I had photos of this but there were more important things to deal with. There was BLUE running out of his nostril.. YES I said BLUE. The shell was melting away but the candy was lodged so tightly in there that there was no way I was going to be able to grab that sucker. I tried to push it down by applying pressure and that was a waste. I went and found the tweezers and he FREAKED. Poor guy ran and hid behind the couch. Tried to call a few neighbors but of course no one was home to help me hold this kid down. (Michael was of course out of town when I needed him).

SO I call the Ped office and laughing hysterically they advise me to pack him up and bring him in.. They will rally the troops and be prepared to hog tie him down for me. NOW here is where the fun time comes in. Today was the last day of Ben being "Star Student of the week" So I had already made snacks to take to school and had a book to read at the end of the day to the class.. So I am supposed to be there in an hour and now I have nose boy to deal with...I call the school and the secretary tells me if I bring them by she will run out and grab the snacks for me to send in.

Even though it is quite chilly I grab the the sandals because they are the first shoes I see. Maddie complies but Andrew starts to freak out. TOTAL freak out. Crying and chanting "I no go to the Docto, NO Docto." Then it happens.. He lets loose a big sneeze and all of the sudden a huge blog of chocolate goes rolling out his nose! I start laughing and grab the tissues. THANK HEAVENS! I was able to cancel the Dr appt and go to the classroom to read after all.

During the clean up I also learned one other thing. He had also shoved a green M&M up the other nostril but that one apparently was able to be pulled out..I hope he figured out ALL candies are bad.. NOT just blue M&M's.

Conversations NOT to be had at 735am.

As with every morning I was prodding Ben to hurry up and finish breakfast, wash up, brush teeth and finish getting dressed. He walked past me and had his Kung Fu Panda T-shirt on and a pair of jeans. I noticed his zipper was down so I said to him " Pull that zipper up... hurry! Before your penis falls out" he laughed at me and tried to tug at his zipper one handed ( he still has the cast on his left arm) saying " It won't fall out.. I have on underwear!". I laughed and replied " OH! They have been known to fall out even with underwear PULL it up FAST!" He looks at me and then to his father as though to say mama is crazy.. Then Michael tells him to yes pull the zipper up " because one day your Penis will have it own brain."
Ben looks at us like we are both crazy and asks " what will my penis do with its own brain?"

I quickly replied "Nothing~! Just pull up your zipper"

I can only imagine how that phone call from the teacher will go.

These kids.....

Are going to be the reason I suffer early insanity. I swear can ANYONE listen and follow simple directions.

DO not play in the water.

Pick up your toys in the living room and put them in YOUR room.

Stay out of Bens room.

See these are pretty basic and easy to follow. BUT.. they are still ignored.

I went to strip Bens bed today to change the sheets. As I pulled the sheet off I notice that the edging FALLS off the mattress causing the mattress side to fall off from the top.. Leaving me a cleare view od the inside of the mattress. NOW we already knew that a new mattress was necessary as this was Michaels way back in the day.. STILL... Thank You Madeline for lovingly tearing all the threads out of the seaming. That was so helpful.

So I leave that bed unmade to make sure that Michael saw this.. Tossed the blankets back on the bed until later.

While I was working on dinner I told all three to pick up the toys and put them away.. I knew I was being ignored by the screams of joy and laughter. I left eventually to stop all the fun and realized that Madeline and Andrew were playing in the bathroom sink and the floor was covered in water and wet towels. What an equal spanking opportunity!
I go back to finishing dinner while daddy gets to tell them how bad they are being. I eat quickly so I can shower before Parent Teacher Conference at 730pm. Quick shower and dressed.. OH CRAP! I need to make Bens bed. I stop in his room adn grab all the trash( his treasures I am sure) off the floor/dresser and pull the comforter off his bed.. The corner is wet.. dang kids obvioulsy spilled on this. I get everything off the bed and see that a good 1/4 of the mattress is DRENCHED in water.. I was so mad.. I coudl hardly see straight.. I KNOW that we need a new mattress and it is not a huge loss but still it pisses me off that I turn my head and they are terrorizing everything.. I swear they are worse now then when they were newly walking and really into everything.

So now I am getting finished to leave and Michael gets a call for work. I put the twins in bed at 7pm, send Ben to his room to pick up everything he already tossed on the floor since I picked it up half an hour earlier.

Then I hear the twins. LAUGHING

Go To Bed= jump off the dresser. DUH... I guess I should have known this.. So I spank them both on the butts now b/c I am really mad. They KNOW this is not allowed.

I storm downstairs and Michael is in his office, I look in and am like " I have to go NOW" he totally forgot I had to go talk to the teacher. He was no longer on a call.. just doing something.. I won't pretend to have a clue.

This day is almost over. I woke with a headache and killer sinus issues.. I end with the same headache and sinus crud.. I have medicated the best way I know how... Chocolate and Ice Cream.

I did it...

I am trying to copy everyone else and start a blog. My stories on myspace have humored people and I have been told many times I should start a blog... So I will try this out...